Tuesday, September 27, 2005

APOCRYPHAL KILLER DOLPHINS

I have no idea if this story has an iota of truth in it, but the fact that it's appeared anywhere other than the Weekly World News (what a fun job those reporters must have!), and just the general craziness of the planet nowadays, makes you wonder if there isn't some truth to it; & if so, it perfectly illustrates the whole "truth is stranger than fiction" thingy....If you haven't heard about it yet, here's the basic premise (which I don't think even the corniest action TV series would attempt to use as a plot line, it is SO freaking absurd!):
Supposedly the CIA or some other "black ops" ballteam decided that they needed to train dolphins to foil scuba-diving terrorists, by equipping them (the dolphins, that is) with toxic darts to shoot at the bad guys, putting them (the bad guys) to sleep so they couldn't wreak scuba-diving havoc & the good guys could grab the bad scuba divers & whisk them away to interrogate them about their secret scuba diving terrorist plans.....ONLY, along came Hurricane Katrina or maybe it was Rita (I'm not quoting verbatim here, people) & swept these attack dolphins out to sea. Wearing their little dartgun equipment. And they don't know where they are. Yet.
(If this story is true..) WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH DO THEY HAVE THESE GUERRILLA ATTACK DOLPHINS WEARING THEIR TOXIC DARTS ALL THE TIME?!? ESPECIALLY DURING A FREAKING HURRICANE?!?
Swimmers; divers; surfers; boaters; little kids with floaties; BEWARE! Here there be killer dolphins on the loose!!!

For that matter, I just find it both incredibly disturbing about us (human people), that we have to go & corrupt an incredibly lovely, friendly, benign creature like a dolphin & teach them to go around shooting poison darts (if this is true). But what's just as disturbing, is that it would totally BE just like us to think up such a thing. That's all I'm saying. For now.

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